X-It Stage Left
by BerryQueen
Summary: Gambit ponders the last few changes in the x-teams over breakfast


Who am I

Who am I?: Berry, where have you been? ;)

I own: Notta' one of there characters but I own the rights to me, myself & I which is currently up for sale on eBay

Anything else: HUGE X-Fan, but I love mocking them too.So if don't take the below seriously, cause everything needs to be poked fun of sooner or later.**PLEASE** read & review 

All work & no reviews makes a dull Berry…

;)

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Gambit crammed another spoon full of Sugar Bombs into his mouth as his mind had drifted on to other events.Why was he still here?Why was he still living under Xavier's roof and playing X-Man?Not that he had given up the dream of course.Yes, he still believed that man & mutant could get along (he'd met enough beautiful human women in his life that had proven why it was a great dream to strive for).

One of the new teams he had dubbed X-Frat.He didn't mind Bobby all that much, only is was pretty annoying how he found him stealing his black trench coat one late Monday afternoon.Bobby had tossed some stupid excuse saying how much it went with his new X-outfit and he'd take good care of it.And, of course, Bobby was now doing his hair just like Remy.The last thing he wanted was a little clone borrowing all of his stuff.

Angel was also on that team, but had some new Fred Durst look going for him.Gambit was confused as to what lead to this.Warren had always been a playboy with the world at his feet.One little breakup with Besty and he buzz cuts his hair and grows a goatee.Gambit began rubbing his jaw thinking that maybe it was time for a shave.

Chamber he didn't really know all that well, but the accent grated on everyone of his late nerves.Gel?Gambit snorted to himself.Even he could say girl, though he preferred chere.Nightcrawler he didn't really care one way or the other, except for the smell.That rank brimstone stench refused to come out of his trenchcoat if Kurt BAMFed by him, thus forcing him to shower & change, yet again, if he was headed out for the night into town.That boy just couldn't take a hint sometimes.

And Wolverine was a whole different story.That boy was everywhere.It seemed no matter where Gambit went in the house, Logan always seemed to be there.It was pretty creepy actually.But, for some odd reason Gambit would never comprehend, Wolverine, being the true loner he is, had joined both X-Teams.Gambit reached across the breakfast table and began to sink his teeth into a shiny red apple.

The first team lacked one thing Gambit really loved; women.Now the 2nd team had a woman, two in fact.Only, one was married.If that was bad enough, there was also a triangle forming between Scott, Jean & Wolverine.And after being a part of the Gambit, Rogue & Joseph triangle, he'd pretty much had enough dealing with triangles to last a lifetime.

Jean also had taken a turn for the worst and now looked like a Madonna impersonator.Normally, that wouldn't have been seen as a bad thing since he'd had a crush on the Queen of Pop since seeing her "Like a Virgin" video.Alas, Jean wasn't a very good one.Gambit had seen men in Vegas pull off the look better.Every time Jean smiled at him, the missing gap between her teeth wigged him out.

Emma Frost, on the other hand, looked great.The first time he's caught a glance at her outfit with all that skin showing, he almost broke his leg rushing up to join the team.Then his eyes caught hold of a slight bulge in her daisy dukes and Gambit quickly ran the other way.And Cyke was on the team looking like a Trekkie.

Remy chucked his apple core into the near by trashcan.Yup, he was bored bored bored.Still living at the X-Pad and refusing to pick a team yet, much to the annoyance of everyone else living there.Why hadn't he demanded to go with the X-Treme team?

Stormy was leading that team.Stormy, his best friend on the team and fellow thief.He missed living with her under the same roof.When he would get home really late, he'd always crash in her bed with her.It was purely platonic of course, but Remy loved sleeping next to a warm body, more so if it was female.And he got out of making his own bed when he did this, which was always a plus.

Psylocke was on the team.Okay, so he trusted her as far as he could throw her, but at least she didn't have a bulge.Gambit shuddered again at the thought.Besides, with her dating Neal, it might just soften her up a bit and not rag on Remy's ass so much.One could dream.And of course the thong look she was bringing back. J Lo had nothing on Betsy's ass.

Speaking of Neal, Gambit didn't know the man very well but figured if push came to shove, he could mold Thunderbird III into something less annoying since he was a rookie and pretty much did anything anyone on the team told him.Actually, that could be kinda fun…

And he liked Bishop well enough.They did make one damn hot team now that Bishop had gotten over that whole traitor trip.They were the X-Men's odd couple.The questioned now begged, was he Felix or Oscar?

His chere was the reason he was staying behind since she'd practically begged him not to come since she might her him.Damn her tears.All she ever needed to do was blink a wet eyelash in his direction and he was hers.But there was only so much a man could take.Clones, Fred Durst impersonations, Star Trek, Madonna wannabees, Wolverine *everywhere*, the bulge...

Finishing up the maze on the back of the Sugar Bombs box (far too easy, pfft, even Jubilee could solve this one), Remy came to his conclusion.He was getting the fuck outta the X-House, that was for damn sure!


End file.
